I found the key to saying “no” to anybody from telemarketers to significant others is to always honor the person and your relationship with them as you say “no.”
Honor the person making the request that you are saying “no” to by first by giving them basic respect. Even though it might be tempting, try not to hang up on anybody including telemarketers. And listen, even to telemarketers, long enough to understand what they are asking of you.
Honor the person by clearly saying “no” to their request. Make it clear that you understand their request, and at the same time that you are choosing to saying “no” to their request. This is much more effective than hinting around that you are a “no” or saying “maybe” when you are really “no.”
Remember, “no” means “no.” It is sometimes tempting to go into an extensive explanation about why you are saying “no.” This explanation just takes up time for both of you and can turn into a debate or even an argument.
Finally, find a way to appreciate the people you are saying “no” to. With a telemarketer, you can always thank them for taking the time to call you and if they are cheerful on the phone, thank them for being cheerful on the phone.
With a significant other, end the conversation where you said “no” by taking the opportunity to let them know how much they mean to you. The trick with appreciating the people that you are saying “no” to, is to be authentic in your praise and not just say a bunch of stuff to make them feel better.
The ability to say “No” to requests in a way that doesn’t create drama is a wonderful tool to have. Have fun saying “No!”
Game of the Day
How can you honor the next person that you say “No” to, while, at the same time, still be very clear in your “No?”